A pleasant dawn,
Off To The Future
December 27, 2013Love
May 13, 2011I have reached a stage
When I am willing to sacrifice
My ego, my anger
For you are the one that understands,
What it means to be holding hands
With the one you love.
Nothing greater than the feeling
of your hair touching my face,
As I take a nap on your lap
Where I can sense the warmth
of your soul reaching out to mine.
O’God! Love is so divine.
I can rest for eternity,
Let everything go
For I have nothing to lose now
When I have you, I know.
I know its dawn,
but please dont go!
Please dont leave me on the shore.
I can’t stand waking up once again.
No longer, No more.
Lucifer
September 27, 2010Phoenix
August 29, 2010Dejected and depressed
as I sat atop the building,smoking
Loving every bit of the smoke
that was coming out of my mouth.
Nervous I was, that this could be the last one
Wished the time could stop ticking
But it went on.
Laying my back on the concrete
As I looked to the stars
I saw a star fall,
I wondered,
If heaven was worth dying for after all.
I held on to the pills tightly
As I took my last puff,
I thought of you
as the stars grew dull
Reminding me of my life
how empty, how null !
From a state of slumber,
I woke up to see the dawn
Despite the cold breeze blowing
I could sense the warmth following
The warmth of the sun
that I was waiting to feel for so long.
You can burn me to ashes
I will not moan
I am a Phoenix
I will live on.
Acceptance
August 23, 2010As I look into your eyes,
I realize
Time has flown so swiftly
A year has passed
And I am still mesmerized
the way I was, when I first saw you.
But I dont feel the same now,
the same from your side,
Your look of excitement
has turned into cold stare
And your feelings for us being together
has turned into complete despair.
You look disappointed in me
Have I done something wrong?
Did I displease you at some point ,
C’mon, be realistic,
I could not please you all along.
I have other things to worry about,
It’s because I care for you too much.
You are right,
I should be left alone.
I should have been left alone.
Love of a Psycho
July 10, 2010Out in the rain
Completely Drenched
I think of you
I think may be
You are the one for me
And baby, I am the one for you.
I think of the drop
That touched your face
I think of you
As you ran towards me in the shade.
I think of how
You looked towards me
For the very first time
I knew back then , this was not the end
And someday, You were to be mine.
I know You are gonna come to me baby
I know we are gonna make love
I know I have to kill you baby
To save you from this fucking world
I will kiss you for the last time
I will gently cut your throat
For you are a piece of art
And then I will kill myself too
For then, not even death could do us part.
Smoking Kills
March 31, 2010My life of what is left now is a cigarrete
I smoke heavily to overcome the regret
Sometimes I take a break from smoking
just lying for a few days in my room choking
in my own breath i feel the urge
for some life, some more breaths to live
while my heart says to me, you have quit
I say I took a lesson from her
I wont trust you darling
and I go out and I smoke again
to live for a few minutes again and ease the pain.
Smoking is injurious to health the covers say
for me Its better to burn out than to fade away.
Living Hell
March 31, 2010Its so hot here
I can feel the pinch
My back’s burning
I try to move but cant
I can’t feel my legs
Seems, Seems like I am in hell.
I can feel my eyes
Coz, they are hurting
I try and open them
To look for what’s ahead
Wait! I can’t see anything
Its too dark in here
It must be the smoke blocking the light
Of the fire that is lit inside
I feel so hopeless
Seems, Seems like I am in hell.
I am feeling thirsty
I need something to drink
Gulp, ehh that worked
But Wait It tasted strange
It wasn’t my spit, It was different
I spit some out
Drops of blood fall over my face
What? I drank blood
I am nauseating
Feels, Feels like I am in Hell.
The smoke’s getting thinner now
I can hear the screams
Screams of people in pain
Am I growing Insane?
I can see someone bending over me
It isn’t the Devil, I can see his eyes
He gives me a hand, which I can’t hold
“Don’t Worry Sir”, He says
I am here to save your lives
As he carries me out to the ambulance
Away from the cries
It made me realize
Angels do exist in this demonic Paradise.
Cry Baby!
March 29, 2010The world is full of hypocrisy
It has been completely unfair to me
I have been cheated and deceited
So what? Why do you come to me
You are nothing but a cry baby!
I have been condemned to a life of solitude
No body wants me in his circle
No body treats me as his equal
My heart is broken, so I weep
I look for support but all I hear is
You are nothing but a cry baby!
What do you cry for?
Remember the time when you were in the womb
You were at peace there with your solitude
So is it so difficult for you to be alone now?
Remember your first day at school
You had no friends then, didnt you?
So why do you crave for friends now?
What do you cry for?
The world is the same for all of us
All you need to do is to focus
Do you really want to be a part of the hypocrisy?
You are down and broken
So go out live life as you have never done before
You have nothing left to lose now
The only thing for you is to explore
The insanity of the human breed
leading their way to hell with sloth, gluttony and greed.
Dont cry for the goners!
They are doomed anyway
Lament upon those to come
Who will be forced to lead their life this way.
July 7, 2009
Fortune Favours The Brave or Does It ?
This saying had a lot of effect in my life personally. Throughout the time I tried getting through those exasperating engineering competitive examinations, I always kept in mind the adage, inspiring myself to work hard, and to have a go for fortune only favours the brave.
A very popular saying is quoted at the entrance of centre court – “Wimbledon”. The saying goes like this – “If only I could meet both triumph and disaster and treat the two impostors just the same.” Well the general idea is that you don’t need to go looking for disaster. Sooner or later it comes your way itself.
Returning to the topic, as most of you I too watched the Wimbledon final match between Roger Federer and Andy Roddick. The result was not out of the blue. But for those who were with me watching the match, it was definitely unforeseen. Wondering that after all these years what will it take to beat Roger at the grandest stage of them all, the aforesaid came to my mind. I wondered whether Andy had come prepared for it this time or not.
Well, the first set removed all the suspicion. Andy was a changed man. The determination could be very well seen in his eyes. He was completely up to the challenge and did not fear a bit, as a result producing those winners which a couple of years back he could have only dreamt of. To add to his armour, was his impeccable serve which unsettled the maestro completely. Never in any match had I seen the master getting in such an uncomfortable position facing the body serve. As a result, breaking the Federer serve he won the first set 7 games to 5.
The valour did not die in the second set for Andy and it went to a tie break. Well at a stage in the tie break, he was 6-2 ahead of federer and had 4 set points. He could have easily won the second set but it seems that lady luck was on Roger’s side. Fortune betrayed him although he was clearly the one with all the valour out there. Between the clash of the two of them, the tennis racket seemed like a magic wand in the hands of federer and a military weapon in the hands of roddick serving aces and producing winners. Roddick lost the second set as federer out of nowhere produced those amazing winners and aces that enabled him not only to save those four set points but also name the set after him 8-6.
Without discussing the third and the fourth set, I want to come down straight to the final set. Out of the approximately four hours of play, not even once had federer been able to break the roddick serve. The set went on, both players unable to break the opponent’s serve. The result was clear. From a game of tennis, it had become a game of breaking the serve. The one to do it first, will win the championship. Earlier, roddick had broken the federer serve twice whereas federer was unable to do it even once. He came close to doing it a couple of times but he just couldn’t get it done. As a result, the idea started setting down in the minds of all, roddick had almost done it. Then came the twist that was needed in the game for federer. With him serving the points tally grew to 15-14. If only roddick could have held his nerves. This game was at a deuce. How many times had we seen before roddick serving two straight aces to get out of the trap. But this time, there was not getting out. There was no escape for roddick. With federer winning the advantage point, roddick just couldn’t calm down his nerves. It is said that the centre court could be either very intimidating or very encouraging for those who play on it. Roddick lost the match. Federer had become the all time champion.
Wait, what went wrong out there? Wasn’t roddick the braver one out there? Wasn’t he the one who should have won the title? My mind was at a fix. I couldn’t believe it. But such is reality. It could carve you with a smile. It was done. Roddick had to eat it. The determination poured down as tears from his eyes. But yeah he did accept it and that too gracefully.
Looking back on what I have written above, what’s the point in writing this? Well there is one. There is this indecision which I took in assuming roddick as the braver one out there. No it wasn’t roddick. Yeah he played superbly, but it was federer who held the nerves at those crucial situations. Although his smiling face never shows any expression of rage or discomfort except a few “come-on”, his mind must have been boggling. Last year he had lost to Nadal in a five setter. It took a great deal out of him to retain his nerves in such a crucial match of his life. But he did it. He was the braver man out there. Yeah lady luck was bringing down rain on his side but I guess now that’s explainable.
This is my first post and am really looking forward to your comments and suggestions. As of me, I am an engineering student pursuing computer science at IIIT, Hyderabad. I would like to be called upon as “sam” by the way.
Thank You.